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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”) q" L* ]7 C0 L8 p) P: i+ ?
- v% k7 L. p; M* m% d5 V3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。, R1 |8 B, X9 M* a! q4 M
& P; b# n: P0 q! F老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。 `# u ~6 V4 T* Z7 f4 i6 M# a
& L+ R. ^5 F6 o( W+ T5 s3 F' F4 j
女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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3 ]# |0 ?& d5 q8 j$ p' e笑死我了。。。
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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* B* W1 ?, A$ [/ U; ^$ W1 z可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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$ K) {# U) ~2 g( A我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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$ H9 y- Q3 Q3 A$ W! e; |; c, z( V她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!4 _3 ^+ ~* ?" U m' ?1 p! ~
: J' t+ e" o b( D5 @, w/ I% u2 Q晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，* [& r$ w! {0 ~/ a
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”: D" Q8 \& g" X, _# T, Z; p- h R
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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. |' G- J( h6 `2 s5 v5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，; [1 _& ]$ h# `3 z" ]0 s2 s( Y
! r7 ^6 z$ Z0 X2 T8 ~6 Y我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！$ Y- O* V# e8 C; d' S7 Q
- I/ E! r( Q" C+ m8 |" Q- F* i一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。* ?$ d8 M' x) f4 u+ C* M
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？* [6 G3 o! J& @3 j" V
9 V" L$ a6 _, }7 `# ]我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。' S8 T4 D! l8 f" x7 V+ n; w; y
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚… X& G; P: Q+ M% D" T& u) I
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当前离线
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