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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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% R2 Q+ | W7 J. J. U2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”: H1 I+ ?7 ]4 K ] J3 V. ]
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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. _2 h% {& |) {' L1 P6 L: e老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。, L4 }( l2 n7 J! F0 `6 i5 b* @: q
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。& j8 C k0 Q6 n: C
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家， i: [" `9 a; R& @- G6 y
& p' `7 a$ u8 ~9 b2 t! `5 @8 X可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，+ g- r& m0 P/ }6 n2 W
, ^# w+ G; l* g; m我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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3 k' J# g5 n, ~. A" {& [她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!' K! Z/ t, h& z; o X/ k- O
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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2 S2 @. ~! q6 {. j! U7 R/ J; B; R恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，% M6 \8 V) c: {2 a" C/ z: N k; R3 E
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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) x/ e+ e& P* ^: L孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…+ O- P& `- G9 U- l% C2 @, p6 i. W
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，+ E" J; r0 f, S) |. T k
& x' i) D: }6 }0 g3 M- `我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！. j" X, E& p8 S+ O) E) U
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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! ?9 C- K5 O8 s f' D% a e% q当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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. d: o# h1 f- `( s/ D! ]我，无业闲人一个。
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0 k6 o+ h: B1 d4 m1 f/ D女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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0 d# E& c4 K/ c2 n3 [: B: M- S8 V我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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/ W1 D" U$ Z( e9 g) _6 x7 @- @5 F女：滚她妈犊子，滚…+ s; P3 U3 T+ d3 D) i
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当前离线
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